Thursday, September 11, 2008

All I Can do is Keep Breathing

Hello. We are about 2 full weeks into the school year, and I already feel like I never even left, which is a good feeling because I'm comfortable, but a horrible feeling because It is very easy to feel a sense of entrapment (not the movie) in good ol' Stevens Point.

NEWSFLASH: I made a new black friend. He is my neighbor, and his name is Manfred. I often like to scream his name in a loud, high-pitched voice.

Can I just say how I have made a few new besties and I LOVE IT. This blog is going to be dedicated to my lovers. My two newest besties are Steph and Kelsey, and even though they aren't as pretty as they are on Facebook, I have had a blast this past week, and they make the unbearable a little more, well..... bearable.

Oh, happy 9/11 by the way!!!!!

Speaking of 9/11 I would like to publicly announce that Liz M. asked me today if I would be her Twin Tower, which was wildly inappropriate at first, but after thinking about it........... how much money could corporate America make if they went with this idea? It'll be like Valentine's day, but less stupid because people who aren't in love won't feel like complete D-Bags. You could propose to someone the day or week before 9/11, ask them if they will be your Twin Tower, TT for short, and then you would dress the same and go on a date on 9/11!!!!!!! You could print cute cards, buy each other American Flag pins..... either I am a wildly offensive and off-base person, or a brilliant mind who just created the next great marketing scheme.

Anyway, let's get the elephant out of the room (I might be using that expression wrong). I was not cast this semester in any shows, which is really really surprising considering I got completely naked during auditions, sang "Underneath Your Clothes" by Shakira, and performed a self-written monologue in which I played a Vietnamese hooker in the '60's. Why they didn't see my potential I will NEVER understand.

Let's move on.

It's not that I hate the majority of Wisconsin, but I definitely could do without the thousands of screams, hoots, and hollers that resound through the streets and startle me every time the Packers score.

I just got a knock on my door from someone doing a survey on Fraternities. Needless to say, I answered "no" to every question.

Time to Leave

I could be napping right now,

Matty B.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

HAHAHA your writing skills continue to make me laugh: From the heart-wrenching "Hurts So Good" to "Twin Towers: Love Rises out of the Embers and Debris," Matty B is the unstoppable, ostensibly offensive, wildly ventricular puppeteer of words. (a newspaper review written by me. Now. Here. -Becca H)