When the Sun Goes Down

My parents are out of town. In other words, I am in a fabulous mood. I took off work for the evening, and I am currently lounging on the sofa with Mallorie awaiting the premiere of Camp Rock, which is the new Disney Channel movie starring the Jonas Brothers. It's kind of a BFD.

Anyway, I realize it has been eons since my last entry, so allow me to recap the antics of my life. When we last left off, our hero and his two faithful friends (James and Stacey) ventured to Duluth for a party entitled "One Night at the Speakeasy." We put on our finest '20's garb (suspenders from ragstock and a faux-old-timey hat, and made the two hour trek to see some old friends of mine. It was a blast!!!

The next day, we went to the Minneapolis Mosaic multi-cultural festival, which consisted of hula dancing, intense booty dancing, step dancing, flamenco dancing, and some other kinds of dancing. It was all good fun except there was this one mildy retarded person in tie-dye who seemed to think they could just join the public performances and dance along with all of the people who had practiced so hard for all of us. She was SUCH an inconsiderate bitch.

Besides that weekend, I have done pretty much nothing fun. I am two weeks into my summer job, working with kids every day. I love chitrins.... but here's the thing: There are 26 of them, and just one other girl and me watching them. How do you like those odds? It is simply not fair. I basically work day to day trying to make sure all the kids stay alive.

Now it's time for a crazy mother story (no, not MY crazy mother, although her craziness hasn't slowed down in weeks of late). There is a mom at our park who has 2 children that attend. The other day she asked us to specifically monitor the drinking habits of her kids because they came home EXTREMELY dehydrated the day before (which basically to them was my fault). So I made the girls drink some wa-wa, and then the bitch calls the city and complains that I was "segregating" her kids when I made THEM drink water and nobody else!!!

If you are out there, lady..... suck it. Segregation is SO '60's, and does DEFINITELY not apply to this situation. If you want your kids hydrated, hook them up to an IV, don't complain to me.

Uh oh, we were just introduced to the "diva" of Camp Rock. This is going to be D to the Rama.

Anyway, too much storytelling in this entry.

Basically, I miss college. Not necessarily Stevens Point, and not necessarily the humans that inhabit central Wisconsin (although I do miss many), but just college in general. When I was young and gay and watching Grease, Danny and Sandy taught me that Summer was supposed to be an escape where you could just roll on the beach and make out under the dock. Where the fuck is my make-out dock partner? No summer lovin' for me? Grease can suck it too.

I have a theory that the Jonas brothers are not, in fact, brothers at all. Let's investigate, shall we?

I will probably update this again really soon because there are a lot of delectible details from my life that I have left out, so stay tuned, folks!


Disney Channel needs to stop producing badly-singing sluts,

Matty B.